Arrg, but I have to keep reminding myself (before it becomes to late) that I can't try too hard to make this really anything great or else it will kill in me this desire to write. I already see little things I'm improving in. I shouldn't try and force on too hard or else I'll lose the precious gift I have right now. An eagerness and joy in writing simply because it so simple. I don't have to fight and struggle to find the right words to say. Because I don't have to say just the right words. I can simply have the overflow of my mind.
I now have one person following my blog. I was thrilled when I saw that my brother wants to read my blog. Ok, so, Joel, I'm going to ask you a question. Don't you think that writing this way is ok? You want to write and isn't the most important thing to do just that? I doubt many people will read this anyway and what they think isn't really what I'm after. My main purpose and goal is to improve as a writer and to make it interesting enough just for those that would take the time to read it anyway, like my family.
I guess I just shouldn't think about it too much and enjoy writing. So anyway. After all this indecision I guess I'm going to come to this conclusion: I'll write what's in my mind and on my heart to the best of my abilities in the hopes that my writing will improve, a few might find some joy and entertainment out of it, and that I'll write it not caring how frivolous or small it is only delving into deeper topics when the mood strikes. Right?
In any event this is what I really consider most important and I should stick to it above everything else. When I fee that what I'm doing is good, productive and most importantly something that pleases and is in God's will for me then that's what really counts. After that there isn't anything worth considering.
So, here's another definition of this blog. Sometimes it will have my heart. Sometimes it will have my head. It will hold a trifle of my life recorded and most importantly, I want it to be something that will glorify God. Even with the simplest thoughts.
Oh boy... I know I tend to twist my sentence structure from one way to another until it's worse then a spiral staircase. I do also tend to go with the flow of things and jump from one thing to another. Oh yeah. Maybe some of this might come to be a little, if only a very little like that 'conscious thought' way of writing...is that what you call it?
Here's my idea set up in a allegorical simile. Lets say someone gather from the beach just loads of sand, going along and just filling sacks with sand. It gets taken home and all those sacks get piled up around the house, and yard. Then someone takes a large trough-like container and sets it up near a pile of bags of sand. Let's say the person is looking for shells (all kinds, beautiful, plain, small, big, broken, whole). They want to collect all the shells up in hopes that they can use sort them out and make something beautiful with the best of them. If this person takes a sack and very slowly, painstakingly searches out only the best and most beautiful of the shells, then they aren't going to end up with very many. At least not anytime soon.
But, if the person pours out the whole sack and starts a new one, and then goes through all of that at once after the fact, the amount of good shells will probably be more.
My point, though not well make, is that if I write and write a lot and a lot about all sorts of things, then I'm more likely to stumble upon the pretty shells and not just have sand. The more I write the more I might get some of those pretty shells...
Ok..I'm just about exhausted from this attempt at convincing myself that this way of writing is ok. (It worked I hope ;) )
Two main keys to free writing to an invisible audience:
- If it's goes with what God wants then it works
- I don't care what people think.
Adios!
Your's (The Lord's) )Truly!(.
Amy
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